7 George Carlin Jokes That Changed The Way We Think

If you are a fan of stand-up comedy and never heard of George Carlin, you haven’t really seen comedy. George Carlin was one of the best comedians ever, well the best comedian ever born! Even Richard Pryor called him his ‘influencer’.

George Carlin was a very cynical comedian, always hitting stereotypes and the system in his sets and complaining about them. People loved him worldwide for his views on things, politics and his comedy as they felt like George was the voice talking about their heads out.

George Carlin's Foolproof System of Organizing Comedy Ideas
(Image Source : Time Magazine)
Today we brought a list of 7 stand-up sets by George Carlin that changed the way people think:
7. “Have A Nice Day” – A Place For All My Stuff (1981)

People just irritate me, anywhere I go there’s someone saying to me, “Have a nice day” and I’m like, “Yeah, yeah… Can you just give me the f*cking change back please?”

This bit was merely an observational bit where he explained his interaction with people on the go; this was loved by a lot of people. He explained how everyone is just wishing you, every time they see you, a ‘Good Day’ by making it worse and how different people have different ways of saying this same to you and he’s just tired of having the ‘nice day’ every day and wants someone else to have the ‘nice day’!

6. “Prison Farms” – Back In Town(1996)

Alcoholics and drug addicts should be imprisoned… Oh, don’t worry not all of them. Only those you are causing problems to at least one other person.

Here he mocked the society for a new founded bitterness. His funny hypothesis about the carting the worst criminals to fenced-off, rectangular-shaped states. With his trademark vocabulary in full force, he spills religious one-liners as easily as he paints absurd mental pictures. He explained the four groups of people that should be imprisoned and why and how they should be managed in a jail!

5. “Planet is Fine” – Jammin’ In New York(1992)

Saving endangered species is one more of a mere attempt by humans to control the nature. Leave nature alone. 25% of species will be gone tomorrow no matter what. The planet is fine. It’s the people who are f*cked!

This bit was one of his personal favorites. Here, George Carlin hits those self-righteous environmentalist over their stupid ‘save the planet’ game. He points out that nature is in no control of nobody and one day everything will extinct and we can’t do anything about it.

4. Things You See/ Hear/ or Want to Hear – Explicit Lyrics(1990)

There’s a lot of things you never see and you don’t know you don’t see them because you don’t see them… you gotta see something first to know what you never saw it, then you see it and say ‘Hey, I never saw that’… too late you just saw that!

The fast-talking, mind-bending wordsmith creates movements of bizarre hypotheticals strung together by his graveling voice. This is more of a innocent bit where he takes the audience to this confusing roller-coaster ride where everyone has to imagine all the things he is saying and realize that they do makes sense.

3. “Death and Aging” – It’s Bad For Ya(2008)

Why people say this to every surviving spouse that, “If there’s anything I can do, anything… please don’t hesitate to ask.” You know, what to tell a guy like that who wants to help! You say, “Fine… please come over this weekend, you can paint the garage.”

This bit was recorded just months before his death in 2008. Here he makes fun of dead people and how people ridiculously people behave when someone known to them dies.

2. Sports – Playing With Your Head(1986)

Tennis is just ping-pong played standing on the table.

While everybody likes his political comedy, Carlin was at his best here when he was focusing on commentary of everyday things like Sports. He very briefly takes on sports here where he differentiate different sports point by point, creating an outstanding observational bit. He points out which sport is a sport and which is not and what things sports should have to qualify as a sport.

1. Religion – You All Are Diseased(1999)

Suppose your prays aren’t answered then what to do you say? ‘Oh maybe it’s god’s will’. Okay fine but if it is god’s will and he’s gonna do what is gonna do, why bother praying in the first place!

This bit can be incredibly relevant but Carlin didn’t care. He knew that nothing in smart comedy was out of bounce. He takes on religion as it is nothing. He knew the all these things from childhood as he was a catholic and always liked to question the religion and people who were blinded by it.

George Carlin is considered to be the ‘god of comedy’ even today. Everything that he wrote in his every bit was golden and he managed to incorporate all his feelings with this beautiful art form called comedy better than anyone else. We miss him with all hearts and will follow his words and comedy till the end.

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